When Will My Problems End? The Real Side Of Fulfillment
Updated: Jul 11, 2022
So often we know what results we want, we know some of the problems we might face and how to get through them as quickly as possible. We want to solve them as quickly as possible to get to a fairy tale land where no problems exist.
Let's get real. Have you ever been able to escape problems? Maybe for some short period of time, for a few days but that was it. Our brain is wired to look for problems.
As a life coach, I see that different levels of success have their own set of problems. For example, one can get mad about a 1$ coupon that was rejected at Walmart. Another can be challenged by the question of where to invest a million dollars that they just made. But the problems are still there.
To dive even deeper, ask yourself what was the best moment of your life?
If you were to engage in some introspection, I bet that included some kind of problem that you overcame. Very often we look at problems as a thing to avoid, yet if we think back, the most amazing moments of our lives included some sort of a problem or a challenge. Most of the time a peak experience of fulfillment happens either right after we overcome the problem or in the midst of engagement with the problem. So we can then say that problems and challenges are parts of fulfillment.
Where am I going with this?
1) Since having problems is unavoidable, let's create more quality problems. We can start replacing low-quality problems with higher quality ones. So what is a high-quality problem? High-quality problems are the ones that are more meaningful and serve a higher purpose. So, creating better goals can be very handy. More meaningful goals create more meaningful problems. For example, if you are an entrepreneur and you want a sense of fulfillment you will get more fulfillment by challenging yourself on how to serve your clients better instead of how to spend 5$ less at the store today.
So, What are your high-quality problems?
2) During life coaching sessions I love asking clients which problems they actually like solving. We rarely do this nowadays. If you hate most of your problems at work, with friends, or with your spouse then it is not a sustainable situation. It is very likely that you are going to burn out sooner or later because you are surrounded by problems that you prefer to avoid, rather than solve. There’s no balance.
As a life coach, I believe that long-term momentum is created by engaging with problems that you enjoy solving, without the hope that problems will end one day altogether.
What are the problems you like engaging in?
What are the problems that you are eager to solve?
To sum up, to create a life of fulfillment, find the problems you enjoy solving, create high-quality ones and engage with them. You will be amazed at how much more alive you feel, as well as the momentum and fulfillment you will create in your life.
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Manson, M. (2019). The subtle art of not giving a f*ck: A counterintuitive approach to living a good life. HarperLuxe.
Dennis Guyvan, a life coach. He provides individual life coaching sessions in Denver and Chicago, and worldwide via video and phone calls. Schedule your free 20-minute coaching consultation with Dennis Guyvan.